Love is patient, love is kind.

well, it’s definitely been awhile since i’ve been on here. recently i’ve had quite a few people come up to me saying they want me to update on my blog and one person saying how much of a blessing it was to them, which in return really made me happy!

The past couple months lots has changed. Rousseaux and i were very blessed to be able to move back down to southern oregon. it’s so weird, neither of us thought we’d really ever like to move back, but boy are we so happy we did. he’s now working at an amazing church that we’re both so thankful for and part time at a coffee shop. he’s doing so beyond much to provide for us and i’m so beyond grateful for that man!

i am now back to seeing my Dr. of who i had for 7 years. i can’t even describe how much of a relief it is to be under the care of this woman. to know how much she loves me and is there for me. so much of my anxiety is gone just because of her. that whole drs office i love so much. my first day back i cried quite a few times seeing so many faces who make my visits good! i am so thankful for each one of them. since being back i have not had a treatment, because there’s been (basically) no active bleeding. the lowest my platelet count got was 3,000 and wow was i bruising. All my symptoms are back since moving here; bloody noses, big bruises, PETECHIA, blood blisters in mouth and lots of gum bleeding. which is just so weird because my platelets were low in eugene, but i hardly showed it! Oh well, unless there’s serious bleeding i’m not going to get a treatment. but if i do get one i have the best nurses in the world who i love and miss so much! they have been some of the most amazing woman in my life over the years and i’m so touched by them!

i’ve been trying to fill up my time, when i’m feeling good, so i’m not home all day. so i started pursuing photography. i’ve absolutely loved it for years, but never really thought about making it a little business, for fun and to help Rous! so i’ve been able to spend hours shooting people and editing. it’s been so fun and i’m so grateful for the OPPORTUNITIES i’ve had. i can’t wait to learn more, experience more and meet more people doing it! Visit to see!

my strength and faith over the past year has been very rough. i’ve questioned god so much. i’ve cried and felt so alone, so much. since getting my new heart disease i’ve really struggled with my faith and walk. the passion that once burned inside me seems to have faded…but i can say with a joyous heart that since moving back down here my hope has increased, my joy and delight in the lord is coming back, my desire to bring his love to this world is there and i’m so excited!

my pastor, kenner, taught on what it really means to love as a christian this morning. i was really convicted, but also really excited and inspired. we are to love as christ loved, which is hard, but we’re called to do it. when i’m tired and don’t feel like loving, i’m called to. when someone is rude and hurtful, i’m called to. when they seem absolutely unlovable, i’m called to.. i pray that this next chapter of my life, our life will be one that i do pour out his love. i want jesus to use what i’m going through to bring his love into this wolrd. i don’t want to be sick, but for the time that i am i want to be used!

quick little story, and i’m done! i was sitting at the drs office waiting for my results (i am always the youngest one in there!!) and this older man sits across from me. he just had a sweet presence about him. he didn’t creep me out like most men who smile at me. he saw that they had to draw my blood twice and he said that made him sad, and he realy meant it. he got called into see his dr and i didn’t think i’d see him again. but they had ordered the wrong tests for me and basically it was taking over an hour to do what should have taken 20 minutes. i was trying not to get mad, which can easily happen at the drs, and i told rous next to me that maybe the lord had a purpose for this. welp 40 minutes later the man came walking out of his appointment and was surprised to see me. he said he was so saddened to see someone so young in there and that he will be praying for me every night and that there really is a god. i stood up and said that jesus is the only one  getting me through this. he came over, gave me a hug and started crying. well, we both did. he said he prays every night on his knees and he faithfully will be praying for me. he encouraged me that this is not it. that jesus is coming back and when he does every tear will be wiped away and every sickness healed. i felt so encouraged by that! it was so neat to see how that was ORCHESTRATED!

i don’t know who still reads my blog, but i love you all and am so grateful for the support and love i’ve RECEIVED from you over the years ♥

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Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails